Bulletproof

I have been in such a great mood for the last couple of days! So glad that im alive. I am starting to think i have super powers and that i am bulletproof, now if i can just switch on my invisible power or fly i think some days id be anywhere but here. I definitely do feel the absence of my son. I am missing him. This is one of the true struggles of life, trying to fill a void. There is nothing to fill it with, i know bc i have been trying. I am not a negative person, in fact i like to think of myself as being very optimistic and positive. I take the bull by the horns bc my life is what i make of it. I find myself in difficult positions having to tell people what happened. Its a sad story, one that sometimes i relive when i am telling it. And its a place that i am trying to move on from. When i got better i hated the idea that i was going to have to go on my blog, pprom support group, and kanalen website and tell this story that has such a sad outcome. Its just not me. I hated it bc i didnt want to scare the ones that were going through the same thing. I know bc i read a couple of devastating stories and cried for these ladies and their families. I dont come across many situations in this life i cant shake off, dust myself off, and walk away from, most of the time with a smile on my face. This is one i cant. Theres no smiling about losing my son. Well i guess im not invincible after all, dang it. I am thankful for this old soul in this young body. Still on this staircase, got to keep stepping. Headed up!