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Sunday, August 22, 2010

Fire and brimstone

My dad was asked to speak at the church Jaramie and i got married in this passed sunday. He called me and asked if i wanted to give my testimony. I did. I had always knew that i would have a chance to speak there one day, i dont know why i just had a feeling about it. I got up there and of course i immediately started crying. I couldnt help it. I have never spoken in public before so i was nervous. Everyone said i did fine. I felt like i was rambling though. There was so much i could say, i couldve talked for an hour but i tried to keep it short. I was glad to do it. Share my story, even though it didnt have the ending everyone wanted but it was my story and God hand picked me for the job and even though i fail him daily and he loves me and i am sharing my faith and its all worth it. What we make of our love for God is our place and no one elses. One thing that does stand out in my mind was looking at Jaramies face sitting in the congregation. His face and eyes turned red. I hated that he got upset, when i returned to my seat i could see where tear drops had stained his shirt. I love him very much.
I hadnt heard my dad speak in over 10 years it seems like, actually i think its been longer than that. I think the last time was when i lived in Kansas. I miss those days. There is something about Kansas that i love and i always will. Dads speaking was powerful and he spoke about things that we all needed to hear. This is why he's so good, it was things that most people dont speak about in fear of offending someone, like homosexuality. Wish you all couldve been there.

Anywho, ive been working alot! I missed my clients so much. I love my job, so glad im alive.
Taking one day at a time.

1 comment:

  1. I just found your blog through BabyCenter. I feel so much sadness and joy for you. Sadness because I too have lost a son. I know the unbearable pain that never ends, it just gets easier to deal with and understand. And joy because I can tell just from reading these post that you are an amazing person. God had a plan when he made you. Even though I lost my son 9 years ago, reading through your blog has made it easier for me. Your faith in God has truly touched me. I had lost my way. But I feel stronger just from reading here. ThankYou!!! I hope everything is going good for you and your family. Your husband sounds like an amazing partner. I'd love to read an update sometime soon. Again, thanks!!

    Keeping God first ;)

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